I had an outstanding idea for a birthday gift for my lovely wife. I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but Toot! Toot! My idea revolved around the fact that none of us really knew what exactly to get her for a birthday present, because she can be notoriously hard to shop for. I decided to bring her the "World", but I wasn't exactly sure how I was going to pull off this grand idea. I had an unexpected flash of genius, and everything became clear. To bring my dear wife the world I would find items from all over the world and place in them in a basket for a proper presentation. You may ask, "Where are you going to find all these worldly items Chris?" Well let me tell you...I wasn't really sure, but the light bulb went off with a trip to Dick's sporting goods to get Jesse some football cleats. Next door to Dick's was a place called, "World Market"..boom! There it was, the answer. I kinda felt like Moses hanging out by the burning bush, only my burning bush was a really cool store with all kinds of items from all around the world. I got items like Couscous, Falafel, Risotto, Creme Brulee, Hummus, Marzipan, Belgian Chocolate with a very high cocoa content, Tikka Masala Curry sauce, Scottish Strawberry/Champagne Preserves, and Real Sangria from Spain- Just to name a few! I put all them bad boys in a basket and wallah! Pretty good gift if I may say so myself. Well, Maddie and Jesse were involved in this process, but outside of signing a card the involvement wasn't that significant until, Jesse decided he wanted to buy his mother a Mars bar and he said, "We can say we got this candy bar from Mars." Great idea, but he doesn't really know a lot about Mars bars and what the Mars really means. Maddie, the star of our show, had the grand slam of ideas for a birthday present. She was consuming a Tootsie-Roll sucker when an idea hit her (she works better under the influence of sugar), and she said, "I've got Mama something for her Birfday." She then proceeded to remove the sucker from her mouth, and put the original wrapper back on. She said, "I'm gonna give this to Mama for her Birfday, you give it to her daddy." This was the ultimate show of love, and while maybe not the most sanitary of gifts it showed just how much Maddie loves her Mama.
Yesterday was supposed to be a day to do the things Cheryl enjoys doing, and we tooled around town going to yard sales, thrift shops, Tannehill State Park Trade Days, and eventually eating at one of Cheryl's favorite restaurants Costa's Mediterranean (If you're reading this and work for Costa's Mediterranean send endorsement fee to the home office in Mount Olive, Alabama.) Maddie was not the most well behaved child on our adventure and we had a few issues along the way. I discovered that a 4 year old throwing a fit in a thrift-store is not really all that unusual or noteworthy in any way but it was not all fun for yours truly. While eating at Costa's Mediterranean (Endorsement #2-Send to Mount Olive, Al.) Maddie lost her balance while trying to put butter on cheesesticks (Don't ask) and almost fell. I said, "Maddie, that's Karma if I have ever seen it." Her response was, "I don't like Caramel Daddy, and I don't want any!" On the way home Cheryl's Toyota Prius was filled with the sounds of a frightened Maddie (who all of a sudden was scared of Thunder) screaming "Thunder!" after every Thunderclap, Jesse singing whatever it is he sings, Me talking about the bad things the "Voices" were telling me to do, and Cheryl playing Candy Crush on my beloved iPhone- All while driving in a Monsoon! Happy Birthday!
Finally, I would like to mention the stories, "Maddie and Twinkle the Wonder Horse" and "Maddie and the Lizard Monster." These are part of a series of bedtimes stories that include the classics "Maddie and the Cotton Candy Monster" and "M2: Judgement of Cotton Candy Day." Well, in a nutshell "Maddie and Twinkle the Wonder Horse" is the story of Maddie and her trusty steed Twinkle saving the neighborhood from a renegade tornado. Maddie was able to lasso this rogue tornado, a-la Pecos Bill, yep I was listening in Elementary School. Maddie and Twinkle saved the lives of the entire neighborhood including preventing the demise of her father, Best in The World and brother Jesse, both are recurring characters in these stories. They always seem to end up in some kind of trouble it seems. Maddie had the quote of the week during the telling of "Maddie and the Lizard Monster" around the time of the introduction of the Lizard Monster, a scary-mean monster who liked to eat little girls. Maddie asked, "Why does he eat little girls?" I said, "He's hungry, I guess." She then said, "He should eat Lizard Food instead." Makes sense to me.
I would like to move away from the exploits of the Amazing Miss Madino for a moment to finish with a huge "Happy Birthday!" for my wife and best friend Dr./Mrs. Cheryl Perry. She's a great lady and I truly appreciate that she chose to spend quite a few of those precious years of life with me. In closing I would like to sing Happy Birthday to Cheryl in a heavy breathing, sexy, Marilyn Monroe voice....Happpy Birthhhhday...Missus Chhheryl..... Well it's a good thing this is a written blog and not one with a video! That's all. Watch out for rogue tornados and Lizard Monsters.