Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Happy Birthday to The Diabolical Dr. Up!

     Today is a very special day!  No, not because I'm a huge fan of ghosts and goblins, but because this was the day when my little "Witchy Woman" was born 5 years ago.  My special little girl is 5, and boy how has that time flown by....It sure has been one heckuva ride!  If young Jesse is my pride and joy and my retirement plan (The 401-J) then Miss Maddie is most definitely the "Apple of my eye!"  This little girl entered our lives and changed all of us in such a positive way.  Her very existence is the truest form of a miracle that I've ever seen, and I've seen a few.  Each day that we've had the privilege of being her family has been better than the next.  She is an amazing little girl, and I thank the Good Lord everyday that I get to see her beautiful smile every morning.  To celebrate the birthday of my "best girl" I've got a few stories to tell about the fabulous Miss Madison Leigh Perry!
     She goes by many monikers, Princess Madino, The Diabolical Dr. Up, Mad Dog Maddie Meanness, the owner and partner of the famous Twinkle the Wonder Horse.  She's got it all!  However it could probably be argued that her greatest job is keeping her poor old daddy straight.  Whether it has been deflecting my ire at folks trying to bypass the system in the Elementary School Pick Up Line by asking me a question about princesses right about the time that I was going to go all redneck up there or telling me to "calm down" when all those idiot drivers seem to appear while we are in the middle of yet another adventure.  She keeps me straight by giving me those million dollar hugs, and keeps me honest by questioning just about everything.  You got to be on your toes around Madino.   One incident in particular occurred at my favorite place on earth.  Wal-Mart.  This day was like any other in the life of the Uber Dad, and I had both kids with me at Sam Walton's house of horrors.  I like to say it is a Tree of Woe, like the one that Arnold Schwarzenegger got hung on in Conan the Barbarian.  But that's another story for another time.  We were shopping for the normal necessities, Ice Cream, Doritos, and Dora Stickers, but young Jesse, ole 401-J himself, decided to pull a disappearing act.  Like most parents, it scares the daylights out of me when one of my children are all of a sudden out of my line of sight.  It happened on this day, and just like that..."Poof"....Jesse was gone!  I was pushing the buggy and Maddie was riding in the front part.  I turned and did not see Jesse.  Obviously, your heart drops when this happens, and I'm an excitable guy anyway.  Needless to say I was fit to be tied!  I backed away from the buggy and began looking in every direction, North, South, East, and West- and no Jesse.  I began to yell, Jesse!  Jesse!  No answer.  I was pretty upset by this time, and Maddie was giving me the strangest look.  Kind of like, "Dad, you're being an idiot."  She said with a flip of the hair with some fierceness that some only dream of, "Jesse's right behind you."  Sure enough, that little S,H,I, you can fill in the rest, had got right behind me, and stayed out of sight during the entire episode.  He is lightning quick, and very fleet of foot so he was able to move on a dime and stay close enough that I didn't know that he was behind me.  However, my lovely Miss Maddie saved the day!  Jesse got his later.
      Shortly after Maddie was born she began to have breathing problems.  This concerned Cheryl so much that she eventually rushed Maddie to the Emergency room at Children's Hospital.  As it turns out she made the right call, she gets lucky like that with decisions every now and then.  Maddie was diagnosed with RSV which is a major cause of respiratory illness in young children.  This was a big enough problem for Maddie to be admitted.  Eventually, Jesse and I were able to go to the hospital.  Upon arrival, I moved quickly, because I don't like hospitals, doctors, or hospitals with doctors in them.  I finally was able to locate the room that Maddie was supposed to be in.  I was shocked to see the door.  It was covered with huge red tape in the shape of an X that read, "Contaminated:  DO NOT ENTER."  I turned to Jesse and said, "Hold up.  What the heck is going on here." To be honest, I'm not sure I said "Heck."  I thought for a moment that Maddie must have contracted the Black Death or Monkey Pox or Both!  I tracked down some medical personnel, and you know it had to be a big deal for a guy who doesn't like medical personnel to actually go find some medical personnel.  I said, "Hey Doc!  What's up with all this warning red tape stuff.  Is this like a doomsday deal or what?"  He explained to me that RSV was very contagious, and they had to take the precautions.  He went on to say that we were in no danger.  I wasn't buying it.  I told him we probably needed some Hazmat suits to go in there, huh?  He again assured me that we were fine.  Hopefully he was right, and I'm not a carrier for some flesh eating virus or something.  Anyway, Maddie ended up fine.  Some early breathing issues, but mostly fine.  I guess if we don't die of the Plague later on, we came out pretty good on the Contamination deal.
     Now I'm going to close this Ode to Maddie post out with a little poem I wrote just for my sweet Miss Madison.  Maybe one day she can look back on this and smile.  I hope so.

When you came around we didn't know,
That there was one thing we needed to grow;

Your big blue eyes and smile so sweet,
Lit up our lives and made us complete;

You've grown so much since that day,
You'll always be my little girl and in my heart you'll always stay;

My beautiful daughter you make me so proud,
With you I always see the sky full of sun with not one cloud;

When I'm with you I see love infinitely,
You, Jesse, and your mom mean everything to me.

I know now, for sure, that there is nothing more important than the love of Family;

Happy Birthday to you Madison Leigh,
You are my heart, my life, and I love you completely.